I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
