were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
we made out on top of his cat.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Randomize
