He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
