a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Houston, we have a blender
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
