i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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