was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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