And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
