We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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