i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
