Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
