i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
