I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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