Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
