Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Randomize
