What a fucking waste of an outfit
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
