That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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