Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i think i have two assholes
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
