he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
