he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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