Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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