I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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