...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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