Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
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