That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
it's like heaven, but drunker
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
