Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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