What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
These tits shall not be calmed
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
