I need help removing her.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
