Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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