I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i just had sex bonerless
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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