So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
