Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
