You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
