I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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