The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Randomize
