is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
So much rum. So many feels.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
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