Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
