Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
