I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
