Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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