We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
drinking out of a sandbucket again
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
