ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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