hell yes lets make some ravioli
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Randomize
