Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
