i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Two words: blizzard sex
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
