Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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