you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize