Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
