everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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