But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
