Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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